your title doesn't impress me.

In the time I've worked at the law office, I've discovered that male lawyers bring catty to an art form that puts the most stereotypical woman to shame.

Perhaps the tendency that disgusts me the most is the one they have of, when irritated with my boss for something unreasonable, dispensing curse words liberally in their communication with me.

Now. I'm no prude when it comes to language. But course language is distinctly out of place in the professional arena, especially amongst the educated and erudite elite of which lawyers fancy themselves the pinnacle. When men of intelligence find creative and subtle ways of insulting each other that don't include conversational terms you'd find in a gutter, I am impressed. When the same men are irate with my employer yet treat me with dignity and gentlemanly respect, knowing I'm not the dog to kick because their feathers are ruffled, I am also impressed. I am not impressed when they resort to schoolboy mouthing off. I am expressly underwhelmed most especially when they feel that, because they're mad at my boss, and I'm just the secretary, any kind of language will do.

I am a lady, thank you. An educated man with a difficult-to-obtain degree can rely on other methods of expressing his anger than punting it at me swaddled in four-letter words. And no, Attorney Swearsalot, I am not cowed by your impressive degree. Treat me poorly because you think you have some kind of right to do so licensed by your two-year graduate degree and I will patronize and condescend and speak overly sweetly to you, with exaggerated and pleasant patience -- as I treat any five-year-old having a temper tantrum. The fabulous thing about my kind of response is that you can hardly accuse me of being rude, and you're probably too stupid to know that you're being insulted, not catered to.

Education has less to do with a diploma and much more to do with humility -- and by humility, I mean the recognition of the inherent dignity of every person, regardless of social stature. A truly educated man reveals himself by his courtesy. Pretensions and arrogance nullify any personal importance attached to his degree.