This one's bitter.
The (New) Christmas Song
Dinner heating in the microwave
Jack Frost nipping at my nose
Money gone that no skinflint can save
Kinda hope the choir members froze
Everybody knows
Christmas specials and some mistletoe
Give me thoughts of suicide
In my bed stemming tears as they flow
I sleep alone and wish I’d died
If only Santa on his sleigh
Would bring me my true love gift-wrapped on his sleigh
But instead I know, deep down, that I
Will toast my parents’ health and try hard not to cry.
And so I’m offering this simple phrase
To all us single gals tonight
Although it’s been said, many times, anyways:
Merry Christmas – we’re all right.
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